Confidence Coaching Posts

Build Self-Worth in Five Steps (One Fun Week at a Time)

Self-worth isn’t something you magically wake up with one day (wouldn’t that be nice?).

It’s built over time, like a really great playlist or the ability to say “no” to an obviously terrible decision (looking at you, neon-green margaritas). The key is to take small, doable actions that slowly rewire your brain from self-doubt to self-celebration.

So, instead of some quick-fix tips, this time, let’s go step by step, with suggestions for change one week at a time. Ready?

Week One: Break Up With Negative Self-Talk

You know that voice in your head that’s always critiquing you like a bad reality show judge? It’s time to evict it.

But first, you have to become aware of when that voice pops up. You see, there is a good chance that your negative self-talk is so habitualized that you don't always know you're doing it. So..

...this week, your job is to notice every time you say something unkind to yourself.

Action: Every time you catch yourself in a self-critical thought (e.g., “Ugh, I’m so awkward”), immediately follow it up with a counterpoint. Something like, “Actually, I’m unique and charming, and I appreciate myself.” Write these down in a notes app or a journal. The goal? By the end of the week, you’ll start recognizing that most of those mean thoughts are wildly untrue. You may even begin to laugh at them.

Negative inner dialogue is often part of the self-perpetuating lack of confidence you feel - you feel unsure of yourself, making you act unsure of yourself, making you decide your actions are proof that you should feel unsure of yourself. See? That's just plain mean.

Bonus Challenge: Give your inner critic a ridiculous name (Bartholomew? Esmerelda?) and literally tell them to hush when they start yapping.

Week Two: Treat Yourself Like a VIP

If you wouldn’t let your best friend talk badly about themselves, why are you doing it to yourself?

This week, practice treating yourself with the same kindness you’d show a loved one.

If it helps, imagine yourself as your own little sister or child. Would you treat your sister or child the way you treat yourself when you're feeling negative? Of course not!

Action: Pick one way each day to show yourself love. Maybe that’s taking a long bath, dressing in something that makes you feel amazing, or saying no to something you don’t want to do (because boundaries = self-respect). Show yourself the grace, patience, and support that'd you'd give to anyone else you love. You may stumble in this goal, but as soon as you catch yourself say, "I deserve better," and then give it to yourself.

Bonus Challenge: Write a love letter to yourself, listing five things you genuinely appreciate about YOU. Read it every morning.

Week Three: Upgrade Your Inner Circle

Spoiler alert:

If you surround yourself with people who drain your energy or constantly make you feel “less than,” your self-worth will take a hit.

This week is all about doing a friend-and-influence audit.

Action: Pay attention to how people make you feel. If someone consistently makes you doubt yourself, take a step back. Spend more time with people who uplift and encourage you. If you don’t have many of those, make it a mission to find them. (Hint: Join a class, a club, or an online group with like-minded people.)

Bonus Challenge: If you’re feeling brave, set a boundary with someone who’s been making you feel small. It can be as simple as limiting your time around them.

Week Four: Own Your Wins (Big & Small)

We often wait for others to acknowledge us, or we assume that if they don't, it must say something bad about us. This puts your self-worth in the hands of others. But self-worth is yours to take!

You accomplish awesome things every day, but if you’re not recognizing them, you’re missing out on a key confidence-building tool.

This week, you're going to own your wins and great traits!

Action: Start a “Win Journal.” Every night, write down at least one thing you did well that day. It can be as small as “I made a really good cup of coffee” or as big as “I asked for a raise.” By the end of the week, you’ll have proof that you are, in fact, a rockstar.

Bonus Challenge: Share one of your wins with a friend, out loud. Practicing self-recognition in front of others builds confidence faster.

Week Five: Do One Brave Thing

Self-worth grows when you step outside your comfort zone and prove to yourself that you can handle more than you think.

Taking chances can be scary but the effects are priceless as far as confidence goes!

This week, you’re going to do one thing that scares you (but in a fun way).

Action: Pick a challenge that stretches you a little. Maybe it’s speaking up in a meeting, going to an event alone, or finally trying that dance class. Whatever it is, remind yourself: Confidence isn’t about not being scared—it’s about doing the thing anyway.

Bonus Challenge: Celebrate it. Post about it, tell a friend, or throw yourself a mini dance party. The more you acknowledge your courage, the more it grows.

The Outcome

By the end of these five weeks, you won’t just feel a little better about yourself—you’ll have built actual habits that reinforce your self-worth every day. Keep stacking these confidence-building actions, and soon enough, you’ll see yourself the way you truly deserve to be seen: as someone worthy of all the good things.

Now go be your amazing, unstoppable self. And maybe treat yourself to a cupcake—you’ve earned it. 🎉

Confidence Coaching Posts

5 Reasons You Should Take More Risks

Taking risks might feel as thrilling as standing at the edge of a bungee-jumping platform—minus the actual safety harness. But here’s the thing: risk-taking is a muscle, and flexing it can lead to incredible transformations. If you’ve been playing it safe, it’s time to swap your comfort zone for a little adventure. Here are five compelling (and maybe even fun) reasons to embrace risk in your life:

1. Unlock Greater Opportunities:

You know that old saying, "Nothing ventured, nothing gained"? It’s true. Opportunities don’t usually knock politely on the door—they’re hiding behind risks. Whether it’s applying for a dream job, starting a business, or speaking up in a meeting, risk-taking opens doors to experiences and connections you didn’t even know existed.

By stepping into uncertainty, you create the possibility for life-changing events. Remember, most of the magic happens outside your comfort zone. Sure, it’s cozy there, but staying put means missing out on the thrilling adventure of discovering what’s out there. Think of risk as the golden ticket to opportunities—and who doesn’t want to be the star of their own Wonka factory tour?

2. Build Resilience and Adaptability:

Taking risks is like sending your inner superhero to boot camp. Whether your bold move turns out to be a smashing success or a "whoops, never doing that again" moment, you’ll come out stronger. Each risk you take teaches you how to navigate the unknown, making you more resilient and adaptable.

Picture this: You pitch a wild idea at work. Maybe it’s embraced, and you’re celebrated as a genius. Or maybe it’s shot down, but you learn how to refine your ideas and bounce back. Either way, you’re leveling up. Over time, the "what ifs" stop feeling so scary because you’ve proven you can handle them, whether the outcome is a win or a lesson.

3. Overcome Limiting Beliefs:

Women are no strangers to the whispers of self-doubt or the nagging voice of societal expectations. But here’s the plot twist: taking risks silences those voices. Every time you step outside the lines of "should" and into the bold world of "could," you dismantle limiting beliefs.

Have you ever told yourself, “I’m not ready” or “That’s just not me”? Taking risks challenges those assumptions. The best part? Each leap chips away at the walls you didn’t even know were there. You might just surprise yourself with what you’re capable of—and how much you love proving yourself (and the naysayers) wrong.

4. Foster Personal Growth and Empowerment:

Risk-taking is the espresso shot for personal growth. It pushes your boundaries, fosters self-awareness, and brings out the version of you who’s ready to conquer the world. Think of each risk as a stepping stone to your most empowered self. It’s not about perfection; it’s about progress.

Every time you take a chance, you’re giving yourself permission to grow. Did you mess up? Great—that’s a chance to learn. Did you succeed? Amazing—that’s proof of what you can do. Either way, you’re building a sense of agency that no one can take away. Soon enough, you’ll be cheering yourself on like your own personal hype squad.

5. Inspire Others:

Your boldness isn’t just about you—it’s contagious. When you take risks, you’re setting an example for your peers, kids, and community. Every time you choose courage over comfort, you’re sending a powerful message: it’s okay to try, to fail, and to try again.

Imagine a friend sees you launch a project, chase a passion, or pivot careers. They think, “If she can do it, maybe I can too.” Your actions create ripples of inspiration. Whether or not you realize it, your risk-taking is planting seeds of bravery in others. That’s legacy-level impact.

Embrace the Thrill

Risk-taking isn’t about recklessness; it’s about calculated leaps toward a richer, fuller life. Sure, not every risk will pay off, but every risk will teach you something—about the world, about others, and most importantly, about yourself. So, the next time you’re faced with an opportunity that feels a little daunting, take a deep breath, smile, and remind yourself: "This could be the start of something amazing."

Now, go out there and take some risks. Who knows? You might just find yourself living a life bigger and bolder than you ever imagined. And if it gets a little wild? Well, that’s part of the fun.

Confidence Coaching Posts

5 Ways Genuine Confidence Helps You Thrive in Uncertain Times

Let’s face it: modern life can feel like a whirlwind of uncertainty. From societal pressures to economic and political upheavals, it’s easy to feel like the ground beneath you is constantly shifting. We spend a lot of time and energy grasping at solutions for the shifts, often without ever feeling progress. That's because the solution has nothing to do with the chaos around you. It's inside you.

Building genuine confidence is about more than embracing the bathroom mirror selfie—it’s about creating an internal foundation that helps you weather life’s storms with grace, strength, and even a little humor. With that foundation in place, you can learn to not only survive uncertainty, but succeed within it. This is why I love confidence coaching. It's not about creating a facade of strength. It's about learning to thrive in any environment.

Let’s explore five ways that cultivating true self-belief can transform how you navigate uncertainty and societal expectations.

1. Strengthening Inner Resilience:

Think of confidence as your internal life jacket. It won’t stop the waves from crashing, but it will keep you afloat no matter how choppy the water gets. Genuine confidence fosters a belief in your ability to handle challenges, even when the path ahead isn’t clear. It’s not about knowing all the answers—it’s about trusting that you can find them when you need to.

Are there rumors of downsizing at work? Talk about stress and uncertain outcomes! Without genuine confidence you might spiral into self-doubt: Do I have what it takes to get through this? What if I fail to find what's next? But when you’ve built inner resilience, you’re more likely to think, I may not know exactly how this will play out, but I trust my ability to rise to every occasion. With this mindset, external pressures feel less overwhelming because you’re anchored in your own capability.

2. Reducing the Need for External Validation

Raise your hand if you’ve ever been sucked into the vortex of social media comparisons. (We’ve all been there.) Society has a funny way of telling us what success should look like—but genuine confidence allows you to shift the focus inward, aligning with your personal values instead of chasing someone else’s version of success.

When you’re confident, you’re less likely to waste energy worrying about whether you’re living up to societal expectations. Instead, you define success on your terms. For example, instead of stressing about having the "perfect" Instagram-worthy vacation, you might prioritize spending meaningful time with loved ones—even if that means staying home and having a backyard picnic. This shift minimizes the anxiety caused by comparison or judgment because you’re no longer outsourcing your self-worth to the approval of others.

3. Improving Decision-Making

Ever felt paralyzed by the fear of making the “wrong” choice? Confidence helps cut through that mental fog by grounding your decisions in your authentic desires rather than fear of others' opinions. When you trust yourself, you’re more likely to make proactive choices—and less likely to be stuck in a loop of regret or second-guessing.

For instance, let’s say you’re deciding whether to switch careers. Without confidence, you might spend endless nights agonizing over what other people will think: What if I fail? Will people judge me for starting over? But with a strong sense of self-belief, you can focus on what truly matters: Does this new path excite me? Will it align with my long-term goals? Confidence empowers you to act from a place of authenticity, making it easier to embrace change and uncertainty.

4. Enhancing Emotional Regulation

We’ve all had those moments when uncertainty feels like a full-blown tidal wave of stress. But here’s the thing: confident individuals are better equipped to stay calm and centered, even when life gets chaotic. Why? Because they trust their ability to handle whatever comes next.

Confidence acts as a buffer against the emotional rollercoaster of uncertainty. Instead of letting fear spiral into overwhelm, you can take a step back, breathe, and approach the situation with clarity. For example, imagine you’re in the middle of a messy project at work. Things aren’t going as planned, and the pressure is mounting. A lack of confidence might lead to panic or even avoidance, but a confident mindset helps you stay grounded: This is tough, but I’ve dealt with tough things before. I can figure this out.

5. Fostering Adaptability and Growth

Life’s curveballs can be frustrating, but confidence helps you see them in a different light.

Instead of viewing setbacks as failures, you begin to see them as opportunities for growth. This growth mindset makes it easier to adapt to societal shifts or uncertain environments without feeling defeated.

Picture a musician whose industry is rapidly changing. Rather than clinging to outdated methods out of fear, a confident artist might embrace the chance to learn new skills, like livestreaming performances or collaborating digitally. Confidence encourages flexibility, helping you pivot when needed and come out stronger on the other side. When you believe in your ability to adapt to any change, you stop fearing change.

Embrace Confidence as Your Superpower

Here’s the bottom line: confidence doesn’t eliminate uncertainty, but it does change your relationship with it. By strengthening inner resilience, reducing the need for external validation, improving decision-making, enhancing emotional regulation, and fostering adaptability, genuine confidence equips you to face life’s challenges with courage and grace. You got this!

Confidence Coaching Posts

3 Reasons Building Confidence is the Key to Better Relationships

Valentine’s Day is near. It can be a beautiful celebration of love, but it’s also a time when many women reflect on their romantic relationships — or the lack thereof. Whether you’re partnered up or single, This post is for you...

One of the most transformative things you can do to create a fulfilling love life (now or in the future) is to build genuine confidence and self-belief. Here are three examples of how genuine confidence helps women thrive in relationships while staying true to themselves.

1. Setting and Upholding Healthy Boundaries

When you have genuine confidence, you know your worth and understand the importance of setting boundaries. For example, imagine you’re in a relationship where your partner often asks for your time, even when you’ve had a long day and need rest. Without confidence, you might feel guilty saying no, worrying that you’ll be seen as unkind or selfish. But with self-belief, you recognize that prioritizing your well-being isn’t selfish; it’s essential both for you and the health of the relationship.

How to apply this now: If you’re in a relationship, start small by practicing saying no to minor requests when you genuinely need to. If you’re single, reflect on past relationships and identify moments when you compromised your boundaries. Use this awareness to define what healthy boundaries look like for you moving forward.

2. Speaking Your Truth Without Fear

Confidence allows you to communicate openly and honestly, even about difficult topics. This is because a major tenet of genuine confidence is the concept that you answer only to you. When you stop yourself from speaking your truth out of fear of upsetting, disappointing, or otherwise displeasing someone, you are acting as though you answer to that other person. But you answer only to you, and if you refrain from speaking your truth, you are letting yourself down. Expressing your needs (even when it displeases another) is not only valid but, again, it's necessary for a healthy partnership between two equals.

How to apply this now: If you’re partnered, think of one thing you’ve been hesitant to share and practice framing it in a constructive, loving way. If you’re single, practice speaking your truth in friendships or family relationships to build this muscle before entering a romantic relationship.

3. Keeping Your Passions Alive

Women with strong self-belief understand that their dreams and passions are a vital part of who they are, and they refuse to let a relationship overshadow them. That includes the exploration of dreams and adventures not yet tried.

In a healthy relationship, you and your partner have your together dreams and your individual likes and pursuits. You walk beside your partner during their adventures, and they do the same for you. Women often fall into the support role only and, after a relationship ends, enter the "getting back to me" stage. But if you never lose yourself, you won't have to get back to yourself!

How to apply this now: If you’re in a relationship, carve out time for an activity that lights you up, and communicate to your partner why it’s important to you. Even if it's something you've always wanted to try but never got around to. Do it now! And if you’re single, well, basically do the same.

Confidence is the Foundation of Healthy Love

Genuine confidence doesn’t just benefit you — it strengthens your relationships. When you value yourself, you teach others to value you too. This Valentine’s Day, remember that love begins with you. By building your self-belief, you’re preparing yourself for a partnership that’s rooted in mutual respect, support, and joy.

(And if you want help with this, consider Confidence Coaching.)

Whether you’re celebrating with someone special or focusing on self-love, use these examples to guide you toward a future where you’re not just in love but thriving as your authentic self.

Confidence Coaching Posts, Artist Development Posts

The Power of Recapturing Old Dreams

There’s a special kind of magic that happens when you decide to follow a dream you once let go of. It’s as if your inner light—dimmed by years of practicality, fear, or doubt—suddenly gets turned back on. And that light? It changes everything. It’s brighter than you remember, filling your days with excitement, fulfillment, and a sense of rediscovery that’s absolutely life-changing.

As a vocal, performance, and confidence coach, I often work with people daring to recapture their old singing dreams. They might have spent decades telling themselves, “I’m not good enough,” or “It’s too late,” or “Who am I to think I could do this?” But when they finally give themselves permission to try, the transformation is nothing short of extraordinary. And here’s the thing—this magic isn’t just for singers. The power of pursuing an old dream is universal.

Dimming Your Light:

Every time you tell yourself, “I can’t have this,” you extinguish a little bit of your inner light. Do it enough times over the years, and you’ll normalize living in a dimmed-down version of yourself. The worst part? You might not even realize how much brightness you’ve lost until you decide to turn it back on. That’s why recapturing an old dream is so powerful. It’s not just about the dream itself. It’s about rediscovering who you really are.

Think about it: if you’ve spent years denying your heart’s desires, what else might you be holding back? Following an old dream is like opening the floodgates to the rest of your authentic self. It’s a permission slip to stop playing small and start living in alignment with who you’ve always wanted to be.

Redefining “Failure”:

One of the biggest reasons people let go of their dreams is fear of failure. Maybe you dreamed of becoming a famous singer but worried you weren’t good enough. Or perhaps you were afraid people would think your dream was silly. But what does failure even mean? Is it not becoming famous? Not being perfect? Here’s the truth: “failure” is only real if you let fear stop you from trying.

Life happens. Dreams evolve. What you once wanted at 20 might look very different at 40, 50, or 60. But that doesn’t mean the dream has expired. Maybe being a famous singer isn’t realistic for you now, but does that mean you should never sing again? Absolutely not. You can still follow your heart in ways that fit your current life. You could:

Become a well-known singer in your local music community.
Host karaoke nights and become the king or queen of your favorite venue.
Bring your guitar to hospitals or elder care facilities to brighten someone else’s day.

You don’t have to sing like Adele to make these things happen. You just have to take the first step and see where it leads.

The Return on Investment:

We often think of success in terms of money or fame. But those aren’t the only returns on investment worth pursuing. Think about how it would feel to challenge yourself, to wake up each day knowing you’re doing something that makes your heart sing (literally or figuratively). The confidence, joy, and sense of purpose you’ll gain are priceless.

When you finally follow your heart, you’re not just pursuing a dream. You’re reigniting a part of yourself that’s been waiting to shine. And the ripple effects are incredible. You’ll notice that as your light grows, it illuminates other parts of your life too—your relationships, your work, your overall happiness. All because you said yes to yourself.

Giving Yourself Permission:

So, what’s stopping you? Maybe it’s fear. Maybe it’s doubt. Maybe you think it’s too late, or you’re worried about what others will think. But here’s the thing: it’s your life. Your dreams. Your light. You don’t need anyone’s permission but your own.

Take that first step. Sign up for a class. Dust off the guitar. Book a session with a coach. Do something—anything—that brings you closer to the dream you’ve been keeping on hold. It doesn’t matter how small the step is. What matters is that you take it.

Because when you do, something magical will happen. Your light will turn back on. And the person you’ve always wanted to be will finally have the chance to shine. ✨

Confidence Coaching Posts, Singing Tips

What We Practice, We Perform

When I was a teenager, I had a piano recital in my 80-something piano teacher’s living room. The audience of about 20 was mostly parents and grandparents of the other performers. It was cozy, supportive, and entirely low-stakes—the kind of setting where you’d think nothing could go too wrong.

But then it happened. As I was playing my piece, I got stuck. My fingers faltered, and I couldn’t find my way back on track. Without thinking, I did what I’d always done when I got frustrated during practice: I slammed my hands down on the piano keys and shouted, “Sh*t!”

The room froze. For five excruciatingly long seconds, the only sound was my heart pounding in my ears. The grandparents looked scandalized. The parents avoided eye contact. My piano teacher coughed delicately into her hand. And I wished desperately for a hole to crawl into.

That was my first real lesson in the idea that what we practice, we perform. My outburst wasn’t just a reflex; it was a habit I’d built by reacting that way whenever I got frustrated. And when the pressure was on, that habit kicked in automatically.

This concept doesn’t just apply to artistic performances, though. It applies to life. Stick with me here...

Why Practice Matters:

If we want to respond and portray ourselves a certain way in public, we have to normalize that mindset and behavior in private. When the stakes are high, we don’t have time to consciously decide how to react—we fall back on whatever we’ve been practicing.

Let’s say you want to handle criticism gracefully. If your internal monologue during private moments is a constant loop of “I’m such an idiot” or “Why can’t I ever get it right?” then guess what? That’s what will bubble up when someone critiques you. Instead, you’ve got to practice telling yourself, “Mistakes are how I learn” or “One piece of feedback doesn’t define my abilities.” Normalize that mindset until it becomes second nature.

Or imagine you want to confidently contribute to group discussions at work. If, in private, you routinely downplay your ideas (“It’s probably not that great”) or silence yourself (“No one wants to hear what I think”), then you’re practicing self-doubt. Flip the script. Practice saying, “My ideas are valuable” or “I have unique insights to share.” Do this often enough, and it will feel natural to voice your thoughts in a meeting.

Everyday Examples of "Practicing":

This principle applies to so many areas of life. Here are some situations where practicing positive mindsets can make all the difference:

When being criticized: Instead of practicing defensiveness or self-blame, practice saying, “Thanks for the feedback” and considering it with curiosity.
When making a mistake: Practice replacing “I’m such a failure” with “What can I learn from this?”
When something goes wrong: If you tend to reflexively blame yourself, practice reminding yourself that not everything is your fault—life happens.
When keeping boundaries: Practice phrases like, “I can’t commit to that right now” or “That doesn’t work for me.”
When asking for help: Instead of feeling ashamed, practice saying, “Everyone needs help sometimes” or “It’s okay to lean on others.”

Practice Makes Confident:

What’s the point of all this practice? It’s to ensure that when you’re on autopilot, you’re steering in the right direction. You’re teaching your brain to automatically reach for confidence, self-compassion, and resilience—even in challenging moments. This is what confidence coaching is all about.

For example, if you want to perform with confidence when someone publicly questions your opinion, you’ll need to have practiced believing in your value during quieter times. Or if you want to stay true to yourself when disappointing someone else, you’ll need to have practiced the mindset that you have a right to honor your needs and values.

The same goes for any scenario, from giving a talk to managing conflict. By practicing positive, constructive mindsets in private, you’re building a foundation that will support you when it matters most.

One Last Thought:

If you’re thinking, “But I’ll never get it perfect,” here’s the truth: You don’t have to. Practicing isn’t about perfection; it’s about progress. Every time you catch yourself practicing a mindset or behavior you don’t want, that’s an opportunity to pivot. And over time, those small pivots add up.

So, whether you’re preparing for a piano recital or navigating life’s curveballs, remember: What we practice, we perform. Practice wisely, my friends—and maybe leave the dramatic piano slams for the theater.

Confidence Coaching Posts

5 Reasons Women Over 50 Feel Dissatisfied – and How to Rekindle Joy

Hitting your fifties can feel like entering a new chapter—one filled with possibilities, but also challenges.

Many women find themselves grappling with feelings of dissatisfaction during this phase of life. The good news? Each challenge is an opportunity for growth and transformation. Face it, you have many decades left! That's ample time to relearn how to embrace life with a sense of ease, positivity, and adventure.

To that end, let’s explore five common reasons women over 50 feel dissatisfied, as well as simple, actionable solutions to reignite your sense of purpose and joy.

1. Unfulfilled Personal Goals or Dreams

Many women realize they’ve put their own ambitions on hold for decades, prioritizing family or career demands. This can lead to a sense of regret about dreams left unexplored.

Solution: Reclaim your dreams by starting small. Make a list of aspirations you’ve set aside and pick one to explore. Whether it’s learning a new skill, traveling, or starting a business, carve out just 30 minutes a day to work toward that goal. Or find a great coach (I know one! 😜) walk with you as you explore and implement new dreams.

2. Empty Nest Syndrome

When children leave home, the change can create a void, leaving you questioning your purpose or identity outside of motherhood.

Solution: Redefine your role and focus on yourself. Consider this your opportunity to rediscover hobbies, connect with friends, or even mentor younger women who could benefit from your wisdom. Volunteering or taking a class in something you’ve always wanted to try can help you create a new sense of purpose.

3. Physical and Health-Related Changes

Aging often brings physical changes that affect confidence and energy levels. Health issues or menopause can make you feel disconnected from your body.

Solution: Shift the focus to what your body can do rather than how it looks. Gentle exercises like yoga or walking can improve both physical and mental well-being. If health issues are a concern, work with a healthcare provider (or a great health coach!) to create a plan that helps you feel your best. Nourishing your body with healthy foods and staying hydrated can also boost energy.

4. Lack of Meaningful Relationships

As life evolves, friendships and family dynamics can shift, leaving some women feeling isolated or lonely - sometimes even when they are surrounded by people!

Solution: Be intentional about building connections. Reach out to old friends, join local clubs, or attend community events. Consider joining groups with shared interests, like book clubs, fitness classes, or creative workshops. Prioritizing quality over quantity in relationships can lead to deeper connections.

5. Financial Insecurity

Financial health is an often overlooked yet essential component to overall health and happiness. Concerns about money—whether it’s about saving for retirement or managing day-to-day expenses—can create significant stress.

Solution: Take control of your financial future by seeking advice. Meet with a financial advisor to create a plan, no matter where you’re starting. Educate yourself on budgeting or investments through workshops or online resources. Gaining confidence in your financial situation can relieve anxiety and open up new possibilities.

Bonus: Tackling Societal Expectations and Ageism

Societal pressures often make women over fifty feel invisible or irrelevant, dampening confidence.

Solution: Rewrite the narrative by embracing this stage as a time of freedom and self-expression. Surround yourself with people and media that celebrate this chapter of life (like Two Coaches, One Life, the podcast I co-host with health coach Lenore Shepard). Remember, your value isn’t tied to others’ perceptions but to who you are and how you choose to live.

The fifties and beyond can be a time of incredible transformation and fulfillment.

By addressing these challenges with intention and self-compassion, you can create a life filled with purpose, connection, and joy. Start small, be patient with yourself, and embrace this chapter as a beautiful opportunity to grow. 🌷

Confidence Coaching Posts

The Power of Admitting Powerlessness

Life has a way of teaching us lessons we didn’t know we needed, often through the people we care about the most.

Recently, I found myself grappling with the pain of watching two people in my life struggle with their own demons. One is a dear friend, the other a client who came to me for coaching and mentorship. In both cases, I know I have the tools and experience to help them move forward—but they’re simply not ready to face what they’re up against.

The hardest part? Admitting there is absolutely nothing I can do to make them ready.

In the case of my client, the difficulty is compounded. They sought me out, invested in the process, and yet they’ve chosen to step away. Their reasons feel valid to them, but through the lens of my own journey and professional experience, I see these reasons as rationalizations. Still, it’s not for me to judge. It’s their path, not mine. My role is to honor their autonomy, even as I wrestle with feelings of sadness and powerlessness.

Admitting powerlessness is uncomfortable, especially for those of us who are natural helpers. But here’s the paradox: letting go is an act of power. It’s not about giving up or shutting the door; it’s about releasing control while keeping an open heart. If you’ve ever struggled to let go of someone who isn’t ready to embrace the help they need, you’re not alone. And while the process is far from easy, it holds incredible potential for growth.

Letting Go with Love:

Letting go doesn’t mean abandoning hope. It means accepting that the timing isn’t right—and that’s okay. In practical terms, letting go looks like:

Acknowledging Your Limits: Remind yourself that you cannot do the work for someone else. Each person’s journey is their own, and no amount of love, advice, or effort on your part can substitute for their readiness.
Releasing Judgment: Resist the urge to label their actions (or inactions) as failures. Instead, recognize that they’re doing the best they can with the tools and awareness they have right now.
Keeping the Door Open: Letting go doesn’t have to be final. You can create space for them to return when they’re ready, without holding onto expectations or resentment.

Turning Inward:

When letting go feels particularly painful, it’s an invitation to turn inward. Why does it feel so hard? What does this situation reveal about your own patterns, fears, or unhealed wounds? For me, two key questions emerged:

What Can I Learn?
Both my friend and my client have given me an opportunity to reflect on how I approach coaching and relationships. Are there ways I can improve how I communicate? Could I create a more nurturing environment that encourages readiness? Every interaction—even the difficult ones—offers valuable insights for growth.
How Can I Grow?
The sadness I feel isn’t just about them; it’s also about me. Does letting go stir up feelings of failure? Am I clinging to the belief that I need to “fix” others to feel successful? These emotions point to areas where I still have work to do. By addressing them, I become a better coach—and a more self-aware person.

The Emotional Work of Letting Go:

As you reflect on your own experiences, consider these questions:

Does letting go make you feel like you’ve failed? If so, why?
Do you fear that stepping back makes you a “bad” person? Explore where that belief comes from.
Are you holding on because you’ve been let go before and still feel hurt by it? How can you begin to heal that old wound?

Letting go often brings up feelings we’d rather avoid, but these feelings are guideposts for our own growth. By sitting with them and working through them, we reclaim our power and strengthen our resilience.

Staying on Your Path:

Admitting powerlessness doesn’t mean stepping off your own path. In fact, it’s essential for staying aligned with your values and goals. For me, this means recommitting to my own journey and remembering that my worth isn’t tied to whether others choose to grow. It also means channeling my energy into the clients and relationships where progress is possible, rather than dwelling on those I can’t change.

Final Thoughts:

The most important lesson I’ve learned through this experience is this: in order to stay in my own power, I have to admit I am powerless over other people’s journeys. Letting go with love isn’t about giving up; it’s about recognizing that growth can’t be forced. And while it’s natural to feel sadness or frustration, those emotions are opportunities for reflection and self-improvement.

So if you’re facing a similar situation, take heart. You’re not alone. By admitting your powerlessness and examining the feelings it stirs up, you’re taking a courageous step toward growth—for yourself and, perhaps someday, for the person you’ve had to let go of. After all, the door is always open when love and hope remain.

Confidence Coaching Posts

How To Manage Imposter Syndrome: Take the Quiz!

Want to learn how to manage imposter syndrome?

Take a number! 70 to 80 per cent of us have dealt with, or currently deal with some level of imposter feelings. The odds increase for you if you're female and/or a minority. So the first good news is you're not alone.

Yay?

The first less-than-good news is, however, if you're newly exploring the possibility, you may have not yet fully uncovered just how strongly it's impacting your life, your choices, and your success. You see, imposter syndrome isn't just overinflated modesty. It's a genuine belief that you didn't rightfully earn your accomplishments or accolades and, at any moment, others could discover your fraudulent nature. And because of that, it can be tricky to pin down.

In my late twenties, I started singing and playing keys with local cover bands.

Despite having a master of music, tons of training and skills, and initially playing with self-taught musicians who often couldn't speak the language of music, I felt less-than in those bands. I hid from challenges and deferred to others' goals. Which is another way to say, I compromised my creativity, my heart, and my progress. I hadn't even begun to try to manage imposter syndrome for one very simple reason I started to mention above...

I genuinely believed that I was incapable and undeserving of more. I didn't think I could do anything about it, so I didn't even try.

When you genuinely believe you are an imposter, you don't know there is anything to fix or transform.

You know the saying. The first step to fixing a problem is acknowledging you have it. But it will likely take outside perspectives to help you see it. At least, in the beginning. I hope this article can provide that much for you! But let me lay out a few steps to make your new path to self-belief easier.

3 First Steps to Manage Imposter Syndrome

Acknowledge it exists in you. The fact that you're reading this right now means you at least suspect it presents some level of challenge for you. So, good on you for being here!
Talk about it. So many of us deal with imposter feelings that if you begin to talk about them, most likely the person you're talking to can relate. Not only will it help you to air these feelings, you could also help whoever you're sharing them with!
Analyze the ways it impacts you. Your happiness and success in career and in life are all impacted when your choices are influenced by imposter feelings. Imagine what life could look like if you felt capable and confident, and then dare to envision making choices like capable and confidence person would.

Learning How to Manage Imposter Syndrome is an Ongoing Process

It's not a switch you turn on and off. It's an evolving journey that can feel overwhelming at the onset, but trust me, the journey is worth it's weight in gold. Worth the emotional and mental weight it will lift from your shoulders. Worth the feeling of being aligned with your most authentic, confident, and capable self.

These 3 steps are a great way to start, but I have an even better tool to help you continue. It's my Imposter Syndrome Quiz.

Answer 10 questions, get your score, and go to a results page (bookmark it!) with a list of Common Traits of Imposter Syndrome. Each trait is explained and comes with a suggestion for an easy mindset shift to help you take back power from your inner "imposter." It's a tool you can return to over and over again on your journey. Take advantage of it!

And if you'd like more customized guidance and feedback, feel free to schedule a chat with me. I'd love to meet you and be a part of your journey.

Confidence Coaching Posts

End Your Phone Addiction: How and Why You Want To

Picture this: You’re at a coffee shop, sipping your favorite latte, and suddenly you realize you haven’t looked up from your phone in 20 minutes. The world could be on fire, but you’d never know because you’re too busy scrolling, texting, or watching funny cat videos. Sound familiar? If so, you might be one of the many people who’ve unknowingly fallen into the trap of phone addiction. But don’t worry, you’re not alone—and there’s a way out!

Signs You Might Be Addicted to Your Phone

Let’s start by getting real: How do you know if your relationship with your phone has gone from healthy companionship to full-blown obsession? Here are some telltale signs:

Phantom Vibration Syndrome: Ever felt your phone buzz in your pocket (or heard a text ding), only to find it didn’t? That’s your brain playing tricks on you, my friend.
Screen Time Shock: You check your screen time stats and are genuinely surprised to see how many hours you’ve spent on your phone today. (Spoiler: It’s a lot more than you thought.)
Multi-Tasking Master (Not Really): You can’t watch TV, eat, or even use the bathroom without your phone in hand. Multi-tasking? Maybe. Healthy? Not so much.
Socializing on Silent: You’re at a social event, but instead of mingling, you’re glued to your phone, liking posts from people who are… also glued to their phones.
Night Owl Syndrome: You say you’ll just check one more thing before bed, and suddenly it’s 2 AM, and you’re deep in a Wikipedia rabbit hole about something totally random.
Did I miss any that you think should be on this list? Add them to the comments - I'd love to hear your thoughts.

If any of these hit close to home, it might be time to reevaluate your phone habits. Either way, don’t worry—there’s light at the end of the tunnel!

The Sweet Freedom of Breaking Up with Your Phone

Now, let’s dream a little. Imagine what your life could be like if you broke free from your phone’s hypnotic grip. The possibilities are endless, but here are a few highlights:

Better Relationships: Without your phone constantly stealing your attention, you can be fully present with the people you care about. Those real-life conversations and shared experiences? Priceless.
More Time for You: Think of all the things you could do with the hours you’ll gain back! Finally, read that book, start a new hobby, or simply enjoy some peace and quiet. You’ll be amazed at how much time you actually have.
Improved Mental Health: Studies have shown that less screen time can lead to lower stress levels and better sleep. Plus, you’ll break the cycle of constant comparison that social media often fuels.
Increased Productivity: With fewer distractions, you’ll find it easier to focus on your goals and get things done. Whether it’s work, school, or personal projects, you’ll be more productive and feel more accomplished.
Rediscovering the World Around You: There’s a big, beautiful world out there waiting to be explored—no screen required. Reconnect with nature, enjoy the sights and sounds around you, and remember what it’s like to live in the moment.

What Are You Really Avoiding?

Here’s the million-dollar question: What are you avoiding by using your phone so much? Sometimes, our phone habits are less about entertainment and more about distraction. But distraction from what?

Ask yourself: Am I avoiding uncomfortable feelings? Maybe there’s stress, anxiety, or boredom that you’re numbing with endless scrolling. Am I avoiding tasks I don’t want to tackle? Sometimes, our phones offer a convenient escape from responsibilities we’d rather ignore. Am I avoiding confronting deeper issues? Phones can be a buffer against facing fears, insecurities, or big decisions we’re not ready to address.

Once you identify what you’re avoiding, you can take steps to face it head-on. Here’s how:

Delete Your Most Addictive Apps: If Tik Tok robs you of hours of your life, get it off your phone. There's no easier way to avoid a bad habit than no longer having access to it.
If removing an app isn't an option (for example, if you own an online business that uses social media for marketing): Turn off notifications and keep your phone out of reach to avoid being lured into checking it.
Acknowledge What You're Avoiding: The first step to overcoming any challenge is recognizing it. Be honest with yourself about what you’re avoiding and why.
Break It Down: Big issues can feel overwhelming, but you don’t have to tackle them all at once. Break them down into smaller, manageable steps, and take it one day at a time.
Seek Support: You don’t have to do this alone. Whether it’s talking to a friend, seeking professional help, or joining a support group, there’s strength in numbers.
Replace Your Habit: Instead of reaching for your phone when you feel the urge to avoid something, try a new, healthy habit. Go for a walk, meditate, journal, call or visit a friend, or engage in a hobby you love.

Let's Chat!

Ready to Take Control of Your Life?

Breaking free from phone addiction isn’t just about spending less time on your device—it’s about reclaiming your life and focusing on what truly matters. If you’re ready to take the next step and need a little guidance, I’m here to help! Schedule a confidence coaching discovery call, and together we’ll pinpoint what’s holding you back and create a plan to help you go after what you really want in life.

Remember, you’re capable of so much more than scrolling. It’s time to become your potential!

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